Good Shabbos. I'd like to tell you a little story.
At the funeral of the richest man in town, a stranger was observed crying harder than all the other mourners. A towns-person approached him: "Are you a relative of the deceased?" To which the stranger replied: "No!" "Then why are you crying?" "That's why!"

The stranger, of course, was crying because he hadn't received anything. But luckily for us, the children of Jacob did, and that's why we are the Jewish people. This week's Parasha is Vayichi, the Parasha in which Jacob blesses the brothers and dies. Which leads me into the four blessing I'm going to talk about...

Reuven's blessing is the first blessing of the brothers. In it, it says, 'Reuven, you are my firstborn, my strength and the first of my vigor, greater by raising and greater by might. Haste like water-do not take more, because you mounted your father's bed; then you desecrated Him Who ascended my couch.'

I immediately thought, 'Why does it say that Reuven is Yaakov's first born?' Of course he was! So why does Yaakov Avinu need to state this? Because Reuven was a first-born who deserved to be praised. Unlike Aisav, who would steal for Yitzchak, Reuven only brought his mother ownerless flowers. Cain hated Chevel, Yishmael hated Yitzchak, and Aisav hated Yaakov. But Reuven was kind, and told his brothers not to spill Yosef's blood.

Because of that, Reuven should have received the first-born's right, the kehuna, and the monarchy. But because Reuven moved Leah's couch into Yaakov's tent after Rachel died, Yaakov became angry with his son, who was as water, which rushes along, and Reuven did not receive the first-born right, which went to Yosef, the kehuna, which went to Levi, or the monarchy, which went to Yehuda.

Next came Shimon and Levi. Their blessing says, 'Shimon and Levi are brothers, stolen tools are their weapons. Into their design, may my soul not enter! With their congregation, do not unite, O my honor! For in their rage they killed a man and in their wish they hamstrung an ox. Accursed is their rage for it is mighty, and their wrath for it is harsh; I will divide them in the Yaakov, and I will disperse them in Yisrael.

My first question about Shimon and Levi was in the first sentence. It says, 'Shimon and Levi are brothers' and I thought, 'of course!' I found two answers. One is that they acted like brothers to Dina (but not to Yosef). The other is that they were not only brothers by their father, but also from Leah.

Then I wanted to know what it meant when it said, 'For in their anger the killed a man, and it was their will to lame an ox.' This sentence refers to Shechem. In their anger, they killed Chamor, and then the rest of Shechem. But what about the ox? Yosef was the ox. It was they who decided to kill Yosef, who is compared to an ox.

Next came Yehuda, who expected to be reprimanded the way his brother were. But he wasn't. The blessing goes, 'Yehuda, your brothers shallacknowledge you; your hand will be at your enemie's neck; your father's sons shall prostate themselves before you. A lion cub is Yehuda; from prey, my son, you went up. He crouched, lied down, like a lion, and like an awesome lion, who dares rouse him? The rod shall not depart from Yehuda nor a lawgiver from between his feet until Shilo arrives and his will be an assemblage of nations. He ties his he-donkey to the vine; to the branch his she-donkey's foal; he launders his garments in wine and his robes in the blood of grapes. Red eyed from wine, and teeth white from milk.'

Okay. That's great. But this is the blessing that many of my questions. Like, why does it say, 'your hands will be at the neck of your enemies?' Is that a blessing? I guess so. Yehuda was the ancestor to David, who said, 'You have given me my enemies at the neck!' David became king because he was able to defeat his enemies.

And then it says, 'From prey, my son you went up!" How was he the prey? Wasn't he the one who sold Yosef? So how, again, was he the prey? He wasn't. HE was the one who preyed on Yosef by selling him. But, true to Yaakov's words, he did eventually go up. He began, even, by not killing Yosef, but rather, as we know, by selling him. He also withdrew from the killing of Tamar.

Next it says that the scepter would never depart from Yehuda. But seemingly, it does. What happens in, say, Babylon? Where is the scepter of Yehuda then? In Babylon, the men who became governers of the Jews were all from Shevet Yehuda, and thusly, the scepter did not depart from Yehuda.

And why, of all things, would he want to wash his garments in wine and the blood of grapes? Maybe it's me, but that's sounds just a bit weird. Here are two different interpretations: 1) It doesn't mean that literally, but rather, their abundance of wine was so great that had they wanted to, they could've washed their garments in wine and 2) they would wash clothes in wine to stain or dye them purple, so as to appear kingly.

Next and last in the blessing I'm talking about today, is Yosef. His blessing goes: 'A son of grace is Joseph, a son of grace to the eye; girls stepped up to gaze. They embittered him and became antagonists; the master of arrows hated him. But his bow was firmly emplaced and his arms were gilded, from the hands of the Mighty Power of Jacob-from there, sheperd stone of Israel. From the G-d of your father, and He will help you, and with the Almighty-and He will bless you with blessings of heaven from above, blessig of the deep crouching below, blessings of castings and womb. The blessings of your father became mighty beyond the blessing of my parents to the bounds of the world's hills. Let them be upon Joseph's head and upon the head of the withdrawn one of his brothers.

You guessed it! Somewhere in there, I got confused! Here's why: It says: 'They embittered him and became antagonists;' So who's they? His brothers, for one, for selling him, and Potiphar and his wife for imprisoning him.

'The masters of arrows hated him.' But again, who were they? Psalms 120:3-4 and Jeremiah 9:7 compare malicious talk to the shooting of arrows, because both can cause harm from a distance. Joseph was the victim of such arrows on the part of his brothers.

'The blessing of your father became mighty beyond the blessings of my parents to the bound of the world's hills.' Maybe you thought what I thought when I learned this: What???

Rashi says the blessings that Jacob recieved were mightier than those of his father Issac and grandfather Avraham because of the fact that while his forefathers' blessings were only about the land of Israel, but G-d promised Jacob that he would extend powerfully eastward, westward, etc. This is why Isaiah said, "I shall feed you the portion of Jacob, your father." And he did not say, "The portion of Abraham."

Now for the most important question in my Dvar Torah and in all of Torah learning: Why the heck do I care? (no, seriously, folks, that's what it is!)

We definitely should care about the blessing of the twelve tribes for this reason at least: The things we do today reflect on future generations. The sins of Reuvain reflect on his future generations, because he does not recieve the monarchy, Kehuna, or first-born's rights. Because of how Yehuda saved Yosef and Tamar's lives, he received the monarchy. Because my grandparents' generation fought for the land, we now have the land of Israel.

So the moral of the story is: Behave, already!

But that raises my next question: What the heck happened to Yosef? He got a great blessing, but did he get it? Clearly not. He just disappeared. But Jeremiah has a different answer. In Jeremiah Chapter 31, Verses 14-19, Jeremiah prophecized that Josef would do teshuva when Moshiach comes. And Hashem will say, 'Is Ephraim my favorite son or a delightful child that whenever I speak of him I remember him more and more? Therefore my inner self yearns for him. I will surely take pity on him...'

Radak says, In a perfect future, children will no longer suffer for the sins of their parents.

This all means that when Mashiach comes, Yosef and Ephraim and Menasheh will be redeemed, and they will get their endless hills of blessings. So when Mashiach comes, don't blame me for all the times when my parents sing showtunes!

And now for my thank yous!

Thank you to my older brother Noah for always being there and making me laugh. Thank you to my younger sister Lizzie for always listening to me complain and for not just making me laugh, but sometimes letting me laugh at you.

Thank you to my parents, who you might know as Bill and Gail but to me they're Imma and Abba, for everything else they've done, especially helping me with this speech and arranging my party, not to mention feeding, clothing and sheltering my for all of my minority.

And thank you especially to Hashem for all the blessings you've blessed me with!

Good Shabbos!




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